4/3/2026 new gaff

I do love a later check out, most places are a 1000 check out but Kohimarama Lodge offers a 1100 one,  and trust me that hour makes all the difference. As Morg had taken my sturdy rucksack last night, all I had to do this morning was throw my toilet bag in my little rucksack, fill up my water bottle and wipe everything down after I'd had my shower and breakfast. Even though I had barely anything to do, I still set my alarm for 0700 just to give myself enough time. Breakfast consisted of finishing off the milk, cheese and a chunk of cucumber. That was the food situation in hand, and with breakfast ticked off I went and sat down to plan my day.

As i did my phone went off and I was delighted to have messages off Dylan, he's only gone and passed his bike test. What a superstar, obviously it's not his full licence due to his age but he can get some good practice on it and learn to ride it in all weathers rather than being a fairweather biker. I'm so chuffed and pleased for him, he really is a go-getter, which Si would have approved of and admired. He would be so proud of him for passing and not only that, he's saved up, put himself through the course, gone out and bought his own bike, insured it and got all the kit without any help from anyone. He did the same with his car..  I'm just gutted that Si isn't here so we could kit up and go out for a ride with him.  Dylan would have learnt so much from him. Seeing those pics and hearing from him has put a little smile on my face. 

I did a ‘Si sweep’ of the unit and hoisted the little backpack on my back, and was mildly surprised it was significantly heavier than I was expecting, too late now because I had all day to kill before checking in to the new pad, which is an unknown entity at the moment!. 

As I walked out of the unit, I snapped a pic of the bananas from the other side and as I did so  Cheryl was walking past towards the other units and stopped for a chat. I gave her the key, and she offered to show me the other units, as I'd asked how many they had. I was amazed to discover they have 9, I wish I had known that before, I really do!! There is one called Elvis, I bloody loved it, it's all done out in 50’s retro style, right down to the crockery table and chairs.

If it wasn't just the one room I'd have been tempted to book it for the next leg of the trip. But I find that having separate living and sleeping areas is better for my broken little brain. The Elvis unit has one of those pull down beds for kids to sleep in, I think they are a splendid invention, pull the bed down, chuck the kid in it and quickly push it back into the wall. Note to self, do a Si sweep before leaving so you don't forget the kid. It appears that Cheryl’s brain works the same way mine does as she said jokingly she always checks for kids after people have checked out. 

I walked down the drive and decided I'd head up to St Heliers for a nice bit of lunch in the sunshine and as there was a delightful breeze blowing I didn't notice the heat of the sun so much. I eventually got to the coffee shop, after stopping to admire the coast line ahead of me, it's the clearest I’ve seen since I arrived, and with the sun shining on the ocean it sparkled like a diamond, it was the most delightful view to enjoy. So I just sat and enjoyed it. Rude not to! There was a jetski sitting in the shallows and not for the first time it crossed my mind that it would be pretty cool to have a blast around the bay on that. It was unattended but I doubt the keys were in it. Shame. 

No Josh or Ros today in the coffee shop, it felt a bit weird ordering my food with someone else. Today's culinary delights making their way down into my tummy was a chicken salad wrap and a rhubarb and pistachio tart ( I'll be making those when I get home) … and the obligatory coffee. I wasn't feeling particularly chatty today, so I kept my head down and just shovelled in my food. People don't want to speak to you when you're sitting at a table eating like an animal. Free tip for you there. You're welcome. 

As I was eating, a lady crossing the road caught my attention out of the corner of my eye. She was so elegant, tall, just wearing a pair of jeans, a blue stripe shirt, and a pair of heels. Nothing particularly glamorous, but the way she carried herself, full of confidence, drew my attention. I felt instant envy, mainly for her almost 6 feet of height, but just for the sheer confidence she exuded. Weird thing to notice, but notice I did. I finished up my food and thought no more about it. 

Just next door to the coffee shop is a really nice clothing shop, unusual and brightly coloured dresses and trousers hang in the windows and on racks outside. A really nice pink and orange dress caught my eye and I am currently deciding on whether to get it to wear for Si’s birthday on Friday. I need to make an effort for his special day, although I do have a really nice dress I made that I haven't worn yet on this trip. I wandered on through the mall and the tall lady was coming towards me, she smiled ,and I don't know where it came from but I blurted out that I loved her style and confidence, like a real creepy weirdo. I don't even know where it came from!! However what surprised me more was her response, her eyes filled up and she gave me a hug. Well I wasn't expecting that, I was half expecting her to call me a freak, punch me in the nose and walk away ringing the police! Predictably, I started apologizing for being a weird creepy person, but honestly it just popped out. She stopped me apologising and told me that i’d made her day. We chatted for a few minutes ,and she said that she likes to compliment random people but has never had a compliment back, and that she wasn't having a particularly good day. It gave her a real boost. Just goes to show doesn't it, you never know what other people have got going on in their lives. When she initially walked past me I thought to myself,  ‘wowzers there's a woman who has got her shit together’ Yes I know i’m still a weirdo going up to random people in the street. Aside from that it actually made me feel a bit warm and fuzzy in my broken black heart. 

After that spontaneous conversation, I decided I'd make my way back towards Kohimarama and as it was still too early to check in to the new gaff, I decided I'd go and lie on the beach for a few hours and get the sun on my aching bones. It was an excellent plan, the sun was hot, and the breeze cool, that can only be described as perfect sunbathing weather! I selected my spot, a tough choice, I had the whole beach to choose from, I opted for going close to the ocean, not so I would be close enough for a swim because the tide was so far out it was almost in Chile, but just for that nice hard compacted sand!. Having settled I set my alarm on my watch to toast myself half an hour each side twice. And I have to say it was very much a recharge I needed. I decided I was energised enough to attempt the walk to the new gaff. 

I'd checked where it was on my map, and concluded it didn't seem that far, and apple maps informed me it was mostly flat. Transpires apple map is a fuking liar, it was not mostly flat at all, it was mostly hilly, North face of the Igor hilly. Apple Maps you are now dead to me, even though you provide me with directions in a manner that even a 5 year old can follow.

Being stubborn and thinking to myself how far can 800 meters be, and having no concept it was so far, I now deeply regret my innate stubbornness. It took me an hour and a half to get to the bed and breakfast. With several long rests along the way. I could hear Simon's voice in my ear, telling me once more I was sacked as tour guide. I'd already sacked myself halfway up so he could shut up bipping on too. As all stubborn people know, you don't quit on principle and I finally made it. Dear god, the regret was real, I could barely put one foot in front of the other or feel my hands by the time I got there and wished I'd taken an uber but that idea felt like a bit of a waste of money. Again, regret! Big regret.  I literally crawled to the door and rang the bell, a little head popped out of the window above me and shouted that she was just on the phone and she'd be down shortly. I parked my arse on the step and drank 2 liters of water. Noisily. Very glad I filled up the bottle before attempting the hike. Which was supposed to be a mostly flat route. Liars. 

Shareen is the owner of the bed and breakfast, and is a lovely Fijiian lady. Her house is stunning, there is a sign to leave shoes on the rack at the door, and the most beautiful wooden and ceramic tile floors throughout. Definitely don't want to be walking on that with dirty shoes. And mine currently have a bit of chewing gum stuck in the treads so no one wants any sticky residue adhering to the floor. The door is a keyless system and you have to wipe your hand over the keypad twice and then put in the code. I was asked under no circumstances to let anyone in even if they're knocking at the door and looking at me with puppy dog eyes.  Noted. Instructions recieved loud and clear.

Just inside the front door is the kitchen and lounge dining area. It's really nicely furnished and very plush by my standards! Outside is a dining table and sun loungers in a nicely maintained garden that are available for use. The kitchen is well stocked and has everything we need. All she asks is that we wash up the mugs and put them away after making ourselves a brew. I can manage to do that, I'm sure.

Unfortunately my room is upstairs and up some rather nice wooden stairs, which in the normal event of things wouldn't be a massive problem but having just climbed Everest the stairs were a distinct problem. I had to resort to my old tried and true method and go up on my backside. It works but it's not pretty. My room is right down the end of the hall, on the way past a closed door, Shareen paused and said this is your bathroom, that was the next problem, I hate sharing a toilet, i like one that isn't down the hallway from my room, I prefer one that doesn't require me to leave my room in the middle of the night and go out into public spaces! I mentioned I thought I'd booked ensuite, and she said I hadn't. I definitely sacked  myself. Instant dismissal and do not collect $200 when you pass go. You fekin idiot. I was slightly mollified when I learnt that i didnt share the bathroom with anyone else, the room opposite mine has a bathroom next door to it. Which is something I guess. 

My room itself is very nice, cosy, with a chest of drawers in the corner and a hanging rack in the other corner. Hanging behind the door is a nice fluffy dressing gown, handy for those night time toilet visits! Ffs.  As I'm only here til Monday morning I'm not too bothered about the lack of storage space. I will live out of the sturdy one like I have before. Morg had rung when I was almost at the top of the hill, and I asked him to ring me back as I was blowing out of my arse and could barely string two words together. He rang once Shareen had disappeared to check another girl in and get me a bottle of water. I told him I was going to try and cancel the booking I had for 2 weeks here in April, because I suspected it would finish me off. The location is too much for my feeble self to manage. However, the ‘manage my booking’ option said I could message the owner and request a free cancellation. Which is what I did, I felt a bit bad as Sharon is such a lovely lady. Before doing so I messaged Cheryl and Pete and asked if they had any vacancies and if they could fit me in for the dates I needed. It didn't matter if I didn't get a refund, either way this lovely bed and breakfast isn't a viable option for me.  Peter and Cheryl got straight back to me and I'm safely booked in with them for April. Such a relief! 

Shareen was absolutely lovely and apologised for not having any ground floor accommodation she could offer me to save me the stairs. I know I'll be ok with them once I've recovered but once again, I lost my dignity, although there were no snot bubbles involved on this particular occasion.  How's that for accomplishment? After she'd checked the other girl into her room, she knocked on the door and said she cancelled the booking for April, and had issued a full refund which was so kind of her. That’s when the snot bubbles arrived, I know, you've missed them haven't you? Don't worry they're still making regular appearances at random times throughout the day.  Fuckers. 

With that little problem sorted I dragged myself to the shower which is bloody good and impressed me enormously. Also included are three varieties of shower gel, and a shampoo and conditioner which is splendid. Shareen had also very kindly located a non slip mat for the shower and offered a stool or chair for me to sit on in there , which i declined i hate those things at the best of times I don't need any more reminders of how useless i am, although i know that certainly wasn't her intention.  

There is one thing i dont like about the bedroom, and it that there is no lock on the outside of the door, there's a bolt on the inside, but my trust issues are rearing their ugly heads again. That's all I need! However I’m sure it will be fine, I’ve just got used to locking a door when I leave. I think that Shareen is here all the time anyway so I’m guessing everything is safe enough.   Before leaving me to get settled she told me the gent in the room next door is called  Scott, an accountant, who stays twice a week, he has two young daughters and seems she's adopted him!  I didn't want to see him or meet him and luckily Morg saved the day by turning up with my bags. I heard his truck beeping as it reversed down the drive. 

He gave me a row for being stupid and making my own way to the accommodation, but once he'd done that he unpacked the bags and he had bought me food to bless him.    He didn't stop long, and after giving me another row, he told me to wait for him tomorrow. I might do that , it feels like a good idea.  Healthy eating is right off track at the moment. Morg is feeding me comfort food, this week, he is of the opinion we need to do what we have to do to get through this week and then I can refocus on taking back control of what I put in my mush next week. Once again I question just who is the parent here. It certainly doesn't feel like me. Thank god ive got him, I would be lost without him, and there's no doubt whatsoever he's certainly a rock when I need him. It's a good job he knows me so well and how my brain works, because he anticipates my actions and reactions so well. I am very aware I am a burden to him though and that's not a nice feeling.

After my tiring and emotional day, I opened the window to let the cool breeze in, pulled down the blinds and decided a good blub was in order. Fuck me, that makes it sound like i was in full control of things, well i can assure you it wasnt a choice at all, it snuck up on me and blindsided me…. Again. Just when I think I'm getting my shit together, here comes a massive wave of grief to remind me i have absolutely no control in this shitty situation. 

Having monumentally messed up with the accommodation I miss Si more than ever, he would have undoubtedly taken the piss, told me I was sacked as tour operator, then asked was I trying to finish him off. He would have insisted on pushing me in Mildred up the hill, so I wouldn't wipe myself out, but he wouldn't have batted an eyelid. He'd have just said don't worry about it babe, solutions not problems. I’m finding myself constantly thinking WWSS (what would Si say) or WWSD (what would Si do) at the moment. It's not helping me feel any better but I'm forcing myself to think differently about things, like the cock up with the accommodation in the grand scheme of things is such a minor issue, it just means I either stay in the bed and breakfast or walk down and get Morg to bring me back. It's just really bloody annoying..  

Si pushed me up to the top of Montmartre in Paris a few years ago and even told me off when I was trying to help him along by self propelling. This hill is on a par with that without the cobbles. Which is something I suppose, smooth pavements is a vast improvement on cobbles, and he did that because he wanted me to see it and the view from the top. . I could just do with a big cwtch up from my boy, and have my hand held while I sleep but that's something that will only ever happen again in my dreams if I'm lucky and that is pretty shit to be perfectly honest...

Much Love

Mrs Leonard

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